This weekend I got to go and use a gift certificate I got for my birthday for a pedicure.  My birthday was months ago, but this was the first opportunity I created for a time out.  As I was laying there "relaxing", I started by feeling increadibly guilty.  First guilty for not using the certificate earlier, then for spending this time away from my family on a Saturday morning, then for not spending the time being more 'productive', and then (and this one is the most rediculous!) for not being present and fully enjoying this break and time of restoration! Seriously, rediculous!

Why do we (mums, women, caregivers) do this to ourselves? When we are working, we feel like we should be with our family. When we are 'just playing' with our children, we feel like we should be working. When we are eating dinner with our family, we feel like we should be doing the dishes. When take a moment to restore, we feel like we should be doing the laundry.  And after it all, at the end of the day we feel like we should have gotten more done! We keep 'shoulding' on ourselves...why?

It is easy to get caught up in our 'to do' lists and forget about the value in our 'have done' lists.

Mindful Mumma Moment:
One evening this week, create a couple moments for youself to explore these feelings. You will need 2 pieces of paper, a pen and a cuppa tea or glass of wine. On the top of the first piece of paper write, "Have done today:". On the top of the other write, "I am an amazing mumma and woman, and today I have:" Then recollect your day. The first piece of paper will have the list of tasks completed that day, and the second will have the value of what was done.

For example:
Sheet 1                 Sheet 2
read to yogini        supported my childs' intellectual development
worked at job        contributed to my familys' fanancial independence
got pedicure          nourished my body and soul making me a better mumma
cleaned toilet         provided a clean, healthy environment for my family to live
practiced yoga       contributed to my longterm overall wellness

Now throw away the first sheet.  Pick up the second sheet and read it from the top.  It will say something like; "I am an amazing mumma and woman, and today I have provided a clean and healthy environment for my family to live". Once you see how much you have really contributed to making your life, and your familys' life, healthy and happier, it may feel easier to give yourself permission to let go of that guilt and be more present in your life.